Final Entry
by Shawen A. Greer
Summary: Post Closure-Mulder's final thoughts, after the episode ***SPOILER WARNING***


Final Entry  
By: Shawen A. Greer  
Rating: G  
Classification: MSR, Angst  
Disclaimer: As everyone already knows, these characters  
don't belong to me but to Chris Carter, Fox Broadcasting  
and  
1013 Productions. They are borrowed without  
permission,  
but without intent of infringement.  
SUMMARY: Mulders final thoughts after the episode  
Closure  
SPOILERS: Closure, very vague reference to Bad  
Blood.  
FEEDBACK: Please, please, please!   
shawen@altavista.com   
My stories and lots of other great ones are at The Hall of  
'X' www.geocities.com/Area51/Quasar/8840  
  
  
FBI Headquarters  
8:25 pm  
  
He held the tattered book in his pensive hands rubbing the  
faded spots of the deep blue cover, as the contents of her  
thick case file fanned out covering the top of his desk.   
He had spent more than half of his life looking for those  
dark pigtails and that innocent smile that he remembered  
so vividly. Though taunted by fabrications of her, grown  
and beautiful, his search had remained for that little girl  
who haunted his memories.  
  
He carefully opened the cover and turned each wrinkled  
page, yellow with age, and read her thoughts again,  
though the words were already etched into his mind. Her  
voice narrated the story, and sorrow filled his heart as he  
shared her fear and her pain in their escalation to hatred  
towards the men who were responsible.  
  
"I think I had a brother with dark hair..."  
  
A solitary tear slid slowly down his cheek and continued  
its downward spiral until it landed in a small splash at  
  
"...I hope someday he reads this..."  
  
He released the breath he unconsciously had been holding  
as his tired body sank back into his chair, turning his  
thoughts to a faraway place he had visited just a few days  
ago. It was a magical place where children laughed and  
played without fear or consequence, where his sister  
could be at peace and unafraid.  
  
Scully had returned to the clearing with him and he told  
her of the children he had seen, laughing and playing,  
destined forever to be children. He told her how his little  
sister who he had searched so long for ran into his open  
arms, and though she spoke no audible words, she shared  
with him answers that his heart yearned to know.  
  
She thanked him for his unselfish heart and his  
determination to find her, as they were able to express the  
love for each other that they had not had the opportunity  
to share before. She told him that he didn't have to worry  
about her any longer, that she was safe and happy, and  
that it was time for him to let her go. She wanted him to  
start living, for her as well as for himself, and to let love  
guide him and show him the way with the promise that  
she would always be with him always even if he was not  
aware of her presence.  
  
He could still feel her hands on his face as her final words  
still haunted him, profound in their simplicity. "Fox, she  
loves you. You're free now, go to her and be happy."   
With that, her arms had tightened around him one final  
time. She kissed his cheek before she ran to join the  
other children that waited for her and he watched as little  
Amber Lynn took his sister's hand, and they ran together  
into the tree line. They stopped only for a moment to  
look back with beaming smiles and wave goodbye, the  
little one blowing him a kiss.  
  
At the end of his tale, he turned his attention to Scully  
who was seated in the soft grass, shadowed by the  
moonlight as it cast shades of blue over them and the  
surrounding earth. Only then did he see notice the  
glistening of the moon's reflection in the silent tears that  
streamed down her cheeks. With little effort, he fell to  
the ground and took her in his arms and held her as she  
cried.  
  
After some time, she wiped her eyes and sniffed, "I'm so  
sorry, Mulder."   
  
He let out a soft, comforting laugh and again pulled her to  
him. "You have nothing to be sorry about. You don't  
always have to be the strong one, Scully."  
  
"I just wanted so desperately for you to be re-united with  
your sister even though logic told me how improbable  
that was." Her voice was quiet and shaky, and he knew  
that she still battled tears that she willed not to fall.  
  
"But we were together, Scully. She was here, and she is  
at peace. I don't have to worry about her anymore. She's  
safe." He felt her nod against his chest and then she  
pulled away blinking back the tears.  
  
If he closed his eyes now he could still see his partner  
sitting there in the moonlight, her hair deepened in the  
dim light, the shadows enhancing her delicate features.   
Overcome by the moment and filled with an inner  
strength he had searched a very long time for, he had  
slowly leaned over and kissed her. It was a soft kiss at  
first as their lips brushed together, but it quickly  
intensified into the passion that he had restrained for so  
long as their mouths sought out each other needing more.   
Before he realized what was happening, he leaned Scully  
slowly back into the blanket of green bringing his own  
weight above her.   
  
Realizing the necessity to put a halt to the moment whiles  
he still could, he shifted slightly taking a place in the  
grass next to her, still holding her in his arms. The stars  
were brilliant in the dark sky above and they lay together  
silently, wondering. Was it possible that the souls of  
Samantha and the other children looked down on them  
from the skies, or was that just poetic expression  
formulated by grieving adults? In either case, they felt  
wrapped in a oneness in this place unlike they had ever  
shared before.   
  
The air turned damp and chilly as the night continued to  
settle around them, hastening their departure. They had  
walked hand in hand back to the car neither of them  
mentioning the events that had just taken place. Though  
now there seemed to be a difference in their relationship,  
still no mention had been made of that night as if  
discussion would mar the dreamlike effect of the  
memory.  
  
The building had emptied earlier, which was typical for a  
Friday evening, and the basement was solemn in its  
silence. Scully had been at the Forensics Lab in Quantico  
all day, so most of his afternoon had been spent much like  
it was now, in quiet reflection and solitude. His thoughts  
finally complete, he turned to a clean lined sheet in the  
book and added his scratchy black handwriting to the  
blue ink of his sister's from so long ago.  
  
"For so many years I have seen you in my dreams,  
the trusting little girl that I knew from my  
childhood, and always as I reached out to touch  
you, you were gone. Always drifting away from  
me like a wave of the sea, drifting into arms reach  
only to be pulled back again by the controlling  
tide."  
  
"Though somehow my heart gave me the strength  
and the courage to go on, knowing that someday I  
would find you. I believed though in the shadows  
of everyone's doubt that we would be re-united  
one day and that I would have the answers to the  
questions that I so desperately sought."  
  
"And when my faith had been tested to the point  
that I was sure that I could not go on, you found  
me. No longer the shy little girl of my memories,  
but a strong and determined young woman aged  
beyond her years having faced more than your  
share of adversity in your short time on earth."  
  
"Finally your spirit is free to laugh and play,  
instead of filled with the endless heartache and  
loneliness you must have faced in this life. Did  
some Divine Spirit accompany you from this cruel  
world? Were you ushered into peace and  
contentment by angels of light?"  
  
"Though many of my questions remain  
unanswered still, the one true query of my soul  
has been satisfied. I can now rest in your peace  
and live in your spirit, for I know that you are  
happy and that you are safe at last. My heart will  
still grieve for all that you have missed in this life,  
and that we have not been able to share this road  
together. Yet somehow I know that we will be  
together again someday, free to be children and  
recapture all that was stolen from us so long  
ago."  
  
"Until that day, I remain as always, your loving  
and devoted brother."  
  
  
The tears blurred the page before him, though they were  
not of sorrow. For the first time in his life, he felt the  
release of the heavy burden he carried. Though his heart  
was somber at the confirmation of her mortality, his spirit  
was at rest, certain now of her subsistence in a place  
beyond the stars instead of among them.  
  
There was a click from the latch as the door opened  
slightly, allowing a wedge of light into the dimly lit room  
and he recognized her small silhouette as she entered.  
  
"I thought I'd find you here." she said quietly. "Are you  
ok, Mulder?"  
  
"I'm fine, Scully, just fine." he offered, unable to resist  
the feeling of vague satisfaction at the offering of her  
routine assertion.  
  
"I'm starving, want to get a bite to eat? I could really go  
for pizza."  
  
He could hear his sister whispering in his ear, or was it  
just the memory, "She loves you, you know," echoed  
again and again as he stared at his beautiful partner, hands  
impatiently on her shapely hips and her head tilted  
slightly to the side, waiting for his answer.  
  
"Well, are you coming?"  
  
He laughed and shook his head, "You know, Scully, you  
have this thing about autopsies and pizza. You scare  
me." The last part offered as an exaggerated whisper.  
  
Obviously less than amused by his observation, she  
turned on her heel as if to leave. "Fine, then don't come."  
  
This only brought more laughter from her devilish partner  
and he finally conceded. "Ok, ok. Give me just a  
minute."  
  
"What are you doing?" she asked as she wandered a little  
closer to his desk.  
  
"Just tying up some loose ends." he said, as he placed the  
papers back inside the open folder and reverently closed  
the front cover. With a final mark of his pen, he wrote  
the word "CLOSED", his initials, and the date and  
expertly pitched it into the "OUT" box behind his desk  
before Scully was close enough to see the name on the  
case file.  
  
He carefully placed the diary in the duffel bag that was  
next to his desk and threw it and his coat over one arm,  
saving the other to rest at Scully's waist as they walked  
together out of the office in search of dinner and whatever  
was to follow.  



End file.
